Types of Pain

Constipation: all that effort without success, like trying to train a cat

Teenage: who the heck would write me a handwritten letter? Oh shit a girl

Cartooning: your best line all night was “The ghost snakes went to the Lil Wayne show and they were all like boo hiss”

Social: dry weddings, dry universities, wet underwear

Strip Club: the next dancer’s name is… Earwig?

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S&M PAIN: THE NEWCOMER

I’m gonna spank that vanilla ass until it’s strawberry!

Ugh, just don’t spank it until it makes chocolate.

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The pizza delivery man didn’t show up so drywall violence