Negative Christmas Carols
He’s making a list, checking it twice
Old Saint Nick: Giver. Cookie Eater. Potential Grammar Nazi?
Come, they told me pa rum pa pum pum
Pa rum pa pum pum? Been hitting the rum?
Rudolph the Red-Nosed Reindeer
Wondered why Santa had a whip
In the meadow we can build a snowman,
then pretend that he’s Parson Brown
Who the fuck is Parson Brown?
All I want for Christmas is my two front teeth
All I want is the music to stop
…
I AM A TOTAL HYPOCRITE, DROP ME A BEAT!
‘Twas the night before Christmas
And all through the ass
The cheek seat was rich
So dense with mass
…
The Ukrainian Bell Carol is awesome / oh yeah that is a reindeer ghost